I'd Lie
by MrsCharmander
Summary: Rose and Scorpius have always been best friends, and that's all they ever will be. Just ask Rose, and she'll tell you.


**Hi! Okay I don't even really have an excuse as to why I've been AWOL for so long, apart from huge writer's block. I promise, a new chapter of my multi-chap will be up in a few days, max. So here's a little song-fic for everyone! Enjoy x**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, any of the characters or this song. **

**Song: I'd Lie – Taylor Swift**

_I don't think that passenger seat  
Has ever looked this good to me  
He tells me about his night  
And I count the colours in his eyes_

"Rose, get in here! Come on, we're already late." My best mate calls from the driver's seat in his Ferrari as I sneak out the window of my house. I know, a _Ferrari_. It's so Malfoy of him! Of _course_ when he said he wanted to learn to drive, his dad spent shitloads for a car. He hates it, says it was a Divorce Gift, which is probably true.

But hey, if I get free rides to parties, I'm not complaining.

We're driving to some party; apparently it's one of Roxanne's muggle friends. Whatever, the important part is it's a _party_. No-one really cares who's throwing it.

We pass under a streetlight and Scorp turns to talk to me. God, what colour even is his eyes? I swear they're grey, but just then the light made them look blue. Weird.

"And then that twat Harwick Davies –you know, the Ravenclaw ponce?- anyway he goes on and on about his fathers' estate and I'm so close to hexing him silent. You listening Rose?"

Oops, I forgot conversations actually involve two people talking.

"Just thinking." I say absentmindedly.

"Try not to hurt yourself." He smirks. Bastard.

_He'll never fall in love he swears  
As he runs his fingers through his hair  
I'm laughing 'cause I hope he's wrong.  
And I don't think it ever crossed his mind  
He tells a joke, I fake a smile  
That I know all his favourite songs_

We rock up to the party, I'm decked out in bangles, strappy heels and a dark purple dress and Scorp is just there in his jeans and a t-shirt. Unfair standards I think. The party is crazy, strobe lights and over two hundred people packed into one house. Muggles, what can I say.

"Think anyone in there is easy enough for you?" I joke, knowing that in about ten minutes tops some other girl will be on top of my best friend.

"You know me Rosie, I'm a big believer in fast friendships. Not love though. If you ever catch me dating someone, Avada me fast. Why would I need a relationship with you around to be my crazy-niffler-lady?" he says, before running into the party to meet Al, who is in there apparently. I laugh, but it kind of hurts, knowing he won't see me like one of those slags in there. It wasn't even a funny joke.

Merlin I'm whipped.

_And I could tell you his favourite colour's green  
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth  
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes  
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie_

"Who's your friend?" some busty brunette purrs to me as I walk in behind Scorp. I think she's tacky. Her dress is like, three sizes too small and those shoes are Gucci knock-offs from Target. Let's not even start on her eyebrows. But hey, I guess her 'other assets' are working for Scorp, because he's kicking me. He smirks, leans into the girl and charmingly says, "Yeah Rosie, who's your friend?"

Great. Wingman Rose, reporting for duty. This is the shitty part of being his best friend. Setting him up with other girls sucks, but it's part of the gig I guess. It's not like he doesn't return the favour, I just don't appreciate the guys he sends my way. Mostly.

"Scorpius Malfoy, 19, Aquarius. His favourite colour is green, and he likes a little known band called The Stirring Pot. Scorpius' interests also include long walks on the beach and snogging. Have fun!" I snap sarcastically, before stomping off to the drinks table.

Well this party has suddenly seems pretty shit.

It was kind of a blur after that, I mean Roxanne found me and we just drank, danced and found some cute boys to talk to. Every time I looked up I just saw that stupid brunette and Scorpius, and I found myself reaching for the next shot. How did that happen?

_He looks around the room  
Innocently overlooks the truth  
Shouldn't a light go on?  
Doesn't he know I've had him memorized for so long?_

My head, oh Merlin. What even happened last night? Oh yeah. Alcohol, and lots of it. Holy shit, whose bed am I even in?

"Fuck, what or who did I do last night?" a groan comes from the lump lying next to me. "Oh, it's just you Rose. God, I thought I might have gone home with that tacky girl. Thank Merlin, I'd have to Apparate out of there and then I definitely would have chucked." I know that voice. I've had that voice burnt in to my brain for how many years now? Great, I'm at the Malfoy Manor, in a bed with Scorpius. Again.

Oh my God, no, not like that! Every party we go home together, crash and spend the next morning communicating in grunts so our heads won't explode. A friendly agreement.

Of course for me, this friendly agreement is hell. I have to wake up next to him, knowing that last night I was the furthest thing from his mind. It should be a good thing when you wake up next to the person you fancy! You should be happy! Why the hell doesn't he realise that I like him? You'd think that if you woke up next to someone every weekend he might just think about me in _that way,_ even for a little bit. Merlin he's dense.

_He sees everything black and white  
Never let nobody see him cry  
I don't let nobody see me wishing he was mine_

After a few hours we're both slightly more awake. I had a shower, grabbed some breakfast from a cafe down the street, made a much-needed stop at a coffee shop and was back in a flash.

We sat in his bed and munched on pastries as he explained in his deep voice his philosophy for not going home with girls.

"Okay so, how I see it is that if I don't actually sleep with them, I'm not a man-slut. Plus, can you imagine what the press would say?"

What? How come his 'snog-only' logic didn't stop him from sleeping around when we were at school? Merlin, year five through seven was a shitty time to fancy him, for sure.

"Scorp," I start, tying my red hair up in a bun, "in Hogwarts you didn't care about what people thought. You literally had a tally in your room of who you had and hadn't shagged. And now you're King Conservative?"

He looks vaguely uncomfortable. _Good,_ I think, _let the bastard squirm._

"It's just that.. Well since my mum and dad.. When my dad was caught.. Uh, it's just that since dad got found cheating, people have been looking for something to connect us with. Like, because he's a huge dick, that I must be too. I dunno, I just don't want people comparing me to him. But yeah, fine line between a Charming Man and a Man-Hoe, you see Rosie?" Scorp says all of this without lifting his head, and when he finally turns up from breakfast, I think I can see some wetness in his eyes. Shit, he _never_ cries!

I think I choked on a bit of danish, to be honest. Not exactly knowing what to do, I awkwardly go over and hug him. My best friend of eight years, who has never once cried in front of me (except when we were thirteen and he fell off his broom and broke his leg), is sobbing into my shoulder. And I feel guilty that, for just a second, a voice inside me is saying _Be with me and no-one would care._

Stupid voice. I mentally step on it.

_I could tell you his favourite colour's green  
He loves to argue, born on the seventeenth  
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes  
And if you ask me if I love him, I'd lie_

After nearly forty minutes of deep and personal shit, Scorp stands up and has a shower. Apparently he had to 'wash off the girliness that just occurred'. Grinning to myself I leave his room and go downstairs to the kitchen. I don't know why I go to the kitchen, it just feels sort of, _couple-y_ to wait in his bedroom for him to get out of the shower. Maybe I'll leave a note and then slip out quietly. Unfortunately, my slipping out plans are cancelled when I get to the kitchen and find it's not empty.

Since Scorp and I became friends in First Year over mutual Slytherin-ness, I've pretty much been a part of the Malfoy's house. I just sort of turn up sometimes and none of his family cares. Okay well, his dad used to be a bit iffy about it, but he left. He was a jackass anyway, no big loss. But it wasn't because his family member was sitting in the kitchen that I was worried, I was worried because _Cass_ was sitting in the kitchen.

"Rose! Stay the night did you? Didn't see you in the guest room. Share with Scorp again?" a devilish grin graced the planes of Cassiopeia Malfoy's face, and Merlin did it look good.

Although Scorp's sister was two years younger, she and I had always been pretty good friends. I let her come around pranking with us even though Scorp grumbled, and in return she let me borrow her clothes. One thing to be said by Cass, is that she knew how to dress. She also knew how to manipulate, seduce and extort, but dressing was the part I paid attention to.

With her ice blonde hair falling dead straight and to her waist and her mothers baby blue eyes, Cassie was striking. Almost as beautiful as Scorp, (if you quote me on calling him beautiful I'll deny it) and she'd been saying I was in love with her brother for the past three years. I vehemently denied that, of course. Slytherins never give away the truth.

_He stands there then walks away  
My God, if I could only say  
I'm holding every breath for you_

"I know you love him Rose. It's obvious. _You're_ obvious. Just tell him, I swear he'd say it too! My brother is a lot of things, and I can honestly say that 'thick' and 'slow' are on that list. Rose please ju-"

"Cass? What are you talking about?" Oh fucking shit. Of course he chose _now_ to get out of the shower. Of course he's standing there in a towel and _Merlin his abs are great. Of bloody course_ he overheard everything and is now looking at me awkwardly.

"We were just uh, just talking about, um- I mean we were saying that- Oh shit." I stammer out, my face turning about as red as my hair. Great, the Slytherin Princess who's known for her sharp wit and even sharper tongue chooses this moment to completely dive bomb. Come on, Rose, there has to be an excuse!

"Rose I… I don't know if I've ever led you on or anything, but I have no feelings for you like that. I mean, Merlin, I love you, but as a mate. You're one of the lads. You know? I mean, I'm not sure if that's what you were talking about but-" I think I can literally feel my heart breaking into a bazillion teeny tiny pieces. Why would he have liked me? He said it himself, I'm a mate. I don't care if he's standing there looking extremely gorgeous with his arm on his neck, or if he's looking at me so earnestly with his grey eyes (they're definitely grey, just like his dad's) that I think I might cry. I don't care about any of that.

"Scorp! Don't be silly! How could you think like that? You're my mate, I would never fancy you. I mean, that would just be weird. Cass and I were just talking about how I fancy Mitch Corner, and that it was weird you hadn't picked up on it. Now if you'll excuse me, I said I'd go shopping with Rox today. Merlin knows why, I mean with out hangovers there will be zero shopping actually happening, but whatever. I gotta go. Talk later, yeah?" I trill, my voice breaking dangerously as my throat closes. But I never lie to Scorp, so he doesn't notice a thing. I brush past him, grab my bag and shoes from last night and apparate away. I vaguely see Cass running after me, but I've already popped away.

My head spins and I throw up in to my mum's hydrangeas, whether from the hangover, Apparating or the conversation I just had.

***  
_He'd never tell you but he can play guitar  
I think he can see through everything but my heart  
First thought when I wake up is, "My god, he's beautiful"  
So I put on my make up and pray for a miracle_

_Stupid, stupid, stupid! _I think, running upstairs as soon as I'm done puking. Thank God my parent's are asleep, I cannot face anyone right now. I throw myself on the bed as soon as I reach my room. My eyes sting, and when I touch my face my fingers come away wet. Crying? Great.

"It's fine, you're fine, everything's fine." I whisper to myself in between ragged breaths and wracking sobs, over and over like a mantra. Tomorrow I'll go over to his house, and pretend like nothing happened. I'm a Slytherin, I'm good at getting what I want. And right now, I want nothing more than him to not know how I feel.

I laugh bitterly to myself, thinking about how close I am, but how mother fucking far, all at the same time. I'm the partner in everything he does. I'm the person he goes to for help or to talk or to hang out with. But I'm just a _mate_. I know more about him than anyone else, even Cass.

I know that he play's the stupid guitar, I know that he knew his dad was cheating before everyone else did, I know that he wants to become a Magical Law Enforcer so that he can use those stupid fucking detective moves he does on criminals. He's crazy observant. That's how he knew about his dad. That's how he knew who did what pranks. That's how he worked out what happened between me and some guy at a pub and beat the shit out of him for touching me.

He knows everything, he's worked it all out. Then how the hell is he so fucking stupid when it comes to me?

And why the hell am I so stupid when it comes to him? Obviously nothing was ever going to happen, but I still held onto that little-girl-crush. I still pretended like we had a chance in hell. I'd wake up and think, "Maybe today something could happen. It will be different". I'd get ready extra-carefully. Had to look my best for dear Scorpius. _Stupid. _

Even as I scold myself, I can feel the tears pouring out.

_Yes, I could tell you his favourite colours green  
He loves to argue, oh and it kills me  
His sister's beautiful, he has his father's eyes  
And if you asked me if I love him  
If you ask me if I love him, I'd lie_

And even now, four years later and I stand as Maid of Honour and his fucking wedding, I still won't admit it.

"Speak now or forever hold your silence"

Of course I have an objection to these couple getting married! But I know I don't have a chance, that I'll just get shot down again like all those years ago. So I don't say anything. I stand next to his _bride_ in a stupid golden dress that gets caught on my heels and washes me out, and I plaster on a smile for my best friend. Because all I am is his _fucking mate._

Cass comes up to me after the ceremony to hand me the first of many drinks. She's harping on about how 'It should be me' and 'Francesca is horrible, always wears those fucking cardigans' and how me and him are 'meant to be', I calmly ignore every bone in my body that's screaming at me to man up, and I say as I have for the past eleven years of my life.

"I am not in love with Scorpius Malfoy"

It sounds like a lie, even to me.


End file.
